The last time I can really remember being surprised by myself was during a run a few weeks ago. I had completed a marathon in mid-November and was starting to get back into a regular running routine (needed recovery + holiday time, you know?).

My wife was with me and as we approached the last hill before our place, I told her I was going to sprint up it just to see how my legs felt.

Surprise – I flew.

Faster than I maybe ever have.

And it felt awesome.

I waited for her at the top and the first thing she said was, “You just flew up that hill…” with a bit of surprise in her voice. Neither of us understood why.

For me, it was kind of nice to know that the time I took off hadn’t caused me to regress. But it also caught me off guard that all of the long, steady runs during marathon training may have had unintended effects on my short sprinting abilities. (Disclaimer: I’m not a sports scientist by any means, so there may very well be studies out there showing that’s 100% impossible. I just know I was surprised by it.)

When I think about applying that unintended “result” to my everyday life, though, I can’t help but think that as I’m concentrating on and working regularly in one area, it may be subconsciously strengthening another area. Meaning, the hard work I’m doing for “project A” will eventually trickle into a future project when I least expect it.

Ultimately, I would hope that’s how it supposed to be; every activity we do and challenge we complete becomes a building block to make us bigger and stronger. Otherwise, I may need to reevaluate what I’m doing to better use my time.

Feeling stuck is frustrating. For me, it can happen both in creating new promotional marketing ideas at work or in trying to produce fresh blog content.

In both situations, I’ve come to find that there are two courses of action that help me get unstuck and back on the path to momentum.

1. Gather inspiration (aka research)
   I love to read and listen to podcasts. I’ve found that all it takes is one line from someone else to really get my imagination going or to spur on a thought that has a life of its own. This is typically more applicable to blogging, but it also helps when trying to brainstorm new marketing elements for my territory.

   As a side note, I keep a journal, send texts and record voice memos to make sure I remember the inspiration as soon as it hits. This is key!

2. Start big picture
   I’ve found that I can sometimes get bogged down in the details. When I take a step back and look at what I’m really trying to accomplish, it helps me at least put something down on paper. From there, I write down whatever comes to me and begin to create a list of options.

   I think it’s easier to filter down to the final message/idea than to start with a microscope and feel heavily constrained.

If there’s no such thing as a dumb question, why do we so often feel paralyzed with fear to ask them?

For me, I think it’s often caused by one of two things: a fear of being told no or a fear of being proven that I wasn’t listening. So let’s analyze the first fear of asking questions and see if there’s any way to overcome it.

A Fear of Being Told No
I’m confident I know when this fear started. Second grade.

How many times do you wish you had asked a question because it would have benefited you? It could be asking someone on a date, asking for a raise or asking for a discount at the store. For whatever reason, we clam up, don’t think we’re worth it or figure they’re trained to say no. But how do you know if you never ask?

True story
It took me approximately six months to convince my wife to go out with me.

a.k.a. I was told no more than once.

#worthit

Another true story
When buying my wife a new coat, I found a local shop and half-jokingly asked, “Any chance there’s a 20% discount for people shopping here for the first time?” He smiled and said yes, in fact, there was.

#moneyinthebank

But what if I had been told no? Did that thought cross my mind? Absolutely.

How to work through it
In his book, Quitter, Jon Acuff talks about how quickly we can let our fears spiral out of control. Like, if I ask this person out and she says no, she’ll probably post about it on facebook and every friend of mine will ridicule me and think I’m a loser for getting shot down, so they won’t ever ask me to hang out with them again because I’ll be that desperate guy that’s always hitting on their friends and then I’ll be ostracized and have no friends so I’ll sit at home on Friday nights trying to make creative memes with kittens.

Wow. That escalated quickly, huh? But it’s true. We so quickly draw out worse-than-worst-case-scenarios and let them stick with us. In reality, those things only happen in romantic comedies (which aren’t reality…).

So let’s take a deep breath and analyze this rationally.

If I asked someone out and they said no, one of two things are likely to happen.
1. It might be a little awkward the next time I see them, but I’ll live and that’ll pass.
Or
2. I’ll give it time and keep wearing them down (see: true story #1 above).

Either way, life isn’t going to end.

I won’t be subjected to making witty kitty memes for the rest of my days.

But the big stuff…
Touché. If you’re going to ask for something serious, like a raise, that half-joking question to a sales clerk won’t cut it. You have to do your homework. Have reasoning behind your ask. Serious questions require serious thought. You have to be earnest in your preparation. But even if the answer is no, it’s important to keep our imaginations in check.

Really think through the “consequences” logically and try to debunk that fear that’s holding you back.

There is a freedom that comes with knowing your world isn’t going to end by being told no. Egos will get bruised. Dreams might be crushed (see: American Idol). But in my own experience, it’s always been more liberating to ask the question and know than to always wonder “what if…”

We’ll analyze the second fear in another post, but until next time…have you found yourself overcoming the hesitation to ask a question? What was the result? Let me know in the comments below!

It’s not always the easiest thing to get to. In fact, it’s typically the first casualty of my schedule when planning my day. But exercise is a must for me – typically a good run or bike ride – but I would actually be up for any sort of challenge.

It helps clear my head.

It gives me time to think.

It provides me with an opportunity to push myself and see measurable progress.

In college, I began running to be able to spend time with my now wife…so it also gave me a foot in the door! Training for full and half marathons together has become challenge we tackle as a team.

Exercise, for me, has far more benefits that just keeping the heart rate up.